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Don’t Shake Hands with the Office Boss if you Live in Newcastle

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Don’t Shake Hands with the Office Boss if you Live in Newcastle, (But You Can Shake Hands with the Window Cleaner or the Toilet Cleaner)!

shakehands1 500x399 Dont Shake Hands with the Office Boss if you Live in Newcastle

Shake Hands

Amazingly, this is all true.  The London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine has done hand swabs of commuters across the UK and come to these key points:

  • Northerners‘ hands are up to three times dirtier than those living in the South
  • Women’s hands are generally cleaner than men’s, but not always
  • Manual worker’s hands are cleaner than those of professionals, students, retired people or the unemployed.
So if you are a recently unemployed financial services man, living in Newcastle, who just left University or are about to retire, you are one of the shittiest, dirtiest people in Britain!

And that’s tough on you,

And that’s tough on you,

And that’s tough on you,

Ha. Ha!  It’s all in the news here: Faecal bacteria join the commute

But if you are middle aged female lavatory cleaner from Clapham, you are the tops!  But you knew that anyway, didn’t you?

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Author: Strangely

The last remaining founder member of the band that would go on to publish as Crawling Chaos. SGI buddhist. Programmer and software development.

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