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Crawling Across Chaos and Time Without End
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Crawling Across Chaos and Time Without End
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Archive for ‘Cycling’ Category
Sore Testicles Why Cyclists Should Wear Black Shorts “Oh dear!”, I thought, when I read this article on the BBC news today…. Read the article. Apparently…
Well I do a bit less than that, so naturally, I thought,
…..as you do, if you’re a bloke, which I am….  A Sperm Fortunately, the article tells you, a bit lower down. And it’s at this point, that you become shockingly aware of the piss-poor science and piss-poor interpretive reporting going on….
Quite simple, really. They’ve completely buggered up any normal definition of the word,
What the article says is that if you are really fit, your good jism count goes down to ~5%. This means 1 in 20 sperms are duff! So for an elite cyclist, normally, most of their sperms are bad. Come, Come. You Can’t be Serious!However, if you are a “normal” bloke, the “normal” amount of fit and healthy sperms is…wait for it… it’s coming…here it is…aaaahhhhh!
So in other words, most men’s sperm is 80% duff. Only 1 in 5 are good! So for a non-cyclist, normally, most of their sperms are bad. Exactly the same. What Is Normal? Born in 1972 in Uccle, Belgium, Axel is the son of five-time Tour de France champion Eddy Merckx. This is my point. It’s normal to have most of my sperm completely incapable of fulfilling their duty. A fit, elite, cyclist, by definition, is continuously stressing their body beyond it’s limits, and when the body is stressed it’s secondary functions are put into standby. It’s the same for women. The point is the poor use of words. In the article, the phrase abnormal sperm is used to describe poor viability sperm. However, most sperm has poor viability!
Research Chris Boardman and his Son The Spanish team has just looked at the jism. They intend to do further research. Might I suggest they do a statistical analysis of the fecundity of former professional cyclists as a starting point. Start with “The Animal”, Eddy Merckx and his son Axel. Then go and chat to Chris Boardman and his son and Bernard Hinault and his. Go and see the cycling daughter of Britain’s greatest ever cyclist, Beryl Burton. These people were at the very, very, top of their sport for years and had children. There are many more like them. Nuff said. Possibly Related Sites
Related Posts by TagsA Week is a Long Time in..
Last week it was announced to the world that 196 convicted French prisoners are going to cycle this years Tour de France route. See the Reuters News item here which originally reported the story: What could possibly go wrong? It’s an enlightened bit of prisoner rehabititation. The 196 inmates plus 124 obviously fit guards are doing the 17 stages, stopping in towns each night that all have a prison, but staying in hotels.
In fact, there is no contrast. It’s the French guards who are protesting about the poor state of things, with five to a cell etc. Taken in this context, the cycle ride does not sound so strange now, does it? Today the Ride Sets Off
Did they, as all the news outlets so humourously remarked, go on a “breakaway sprint” which “are obviously not allowed”? Or maybe they feared they’d have to cycle through Mulhouse which has this interesting cycle lane to negotiate.
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Quoting from The Journal, Live, here’s what happened:
Denis Moore, 50, regularly drove his partner’s Hyundai Matrix mobility car despite only holding a provisional licence. Durham Crown Court was told yesterday how he was behind the wheel when he collided with cyclist James Jorgensen at 6pm on September 24 last year. Mr Jorgensen, 55, of East Shore Village, Seaham, County Durham, was riding round a roundabout near his home when Moore’s car hit him. He was flung to the ground and died eight days later of severe head injuries. But Moore, 50, of Byron Terrace, Houghton-le-Spring, near Sunderland, escaped jail after the court was told Mr Jorgensen had not been wearing a safety helmet.
The twat judge is no better and should be strung up or struck off. Like our forgetful MPs and their expenses, the judge has shown a complete disregard for the law, both literally and in it’s spirit. The judge’s tiny supposition that “helmets are safe” has completely outweighed the cascade of offences that Moore committed by actually driving on the public highway. If Jorgenson had lived, what hope would there have been for him to get any damages from Moore? None! Because by driving on the road, Moore’s insurance was invalidated and any compensation would have had to be derived from Moore’s limited means. His partner Bell was the same by allowing the offences. In fact, it could be argued that Jorgenson, the cyclist, may have cycled differently and avoided a collision if he’d spotted some L-Plates on Moore’s car – but of course, Moore didn’t have any.
The completely un-reasoned argument the judge used could be applied to all ‘accidents’ (I hate that term – they should be called crashes, because that’s what they are, and almost all are completely avoidable). By the same criteria;
It’s the same, stupid, un-reasoned logic that shifts the onus of responsibility onto the injured person.
Latest NewsI saw this tragic news (Pregnant woman dies in kerb crash) after writing the above today. Both the woman and her foetus died when hit by a BMW while walking on the footpath. It’ll be interesting to see if the stupid logic of the previous case is used when justice is finally served… Should she have been wearing a suit of armour last night? Can you see the rubbish logic at work now? See local news link: Pregnant Carlisle woman dies after car mounts pavement References
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Posted on 21:42, June 29th, 2009 by 
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Now contrast this with the report last month about the shocking state of French jails (Prison guards’ strike hits packed French jails). 
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